100WC Week 5 - Nice to be Home

Mum struggled over to the gleaming mahogany dining table. She carried a large, embellished bowl billowing with hot, silver smoke. Her only son, Charlie, was home from boarding school for the holidays.
She had missed him so greatly; the house had been so quiet since Charlie's father had passed away. Mum's afternoon had been spent peeling and stewing, kneading and baking. She wanted to make sure Charlie's favourite apple pie would be perfect.
Charlie helped himself to a serving of piping hot, crumbly pie. The pie was superlative and the custard tasted like heaven. Charlie looked at Mum and said,
"It's nice to be home".

100WC Week 5 - Blackberry Picking

The blackberries were a bit sharp but the custard tasted like heaven on a spoon! As she lifted another spoonful to her mouth she remembered the day that they had picked the blackberries. Small, grey clouds on the horizon had signalled the approaching rain, but they had gone anyway. Gramps had taken his old, gnarled walking stick with the large, curled handle so that they could reach deep into the hedges. They had both got soaked when the rain eventually started; but it had been worth it. Now Grandma’s delicious custard was dancing sweetly on her tongue.

“Grandma, can I have some more please?”

100WC Week 5 - Hospital Food

Lumpy, springy bed, aching, tired feet. My fear of hospitals goes to back my childhood, not sure why maybe the thought of the cold, eerie corridors, or maybe all the coughing, spluttering sick people you always associate with them.

As I wait to be discharged I can hear behind the curtain, an elderly lady jabbering away. Moaning about something or other flittering between subjects, and then returning to the TV, something must’ve caught her attention, quiet resumes.

As I collect my bag I hear one final whip from the impatient patient

“Nurse, the custard tasted like wallpaper paste.”

I smiled, I enjoyed mine.

100WC Week 5 - Rancid Eggs

Beads of sweat began to roll down his temples. He tapped the microphone, then jumped as it squealed into life. They studied his hands moving over the bowls and pans until, with a puffed-out, cock-robin chest he held the ladle high and let the thick, yellow custard tumble into the pan. It slopped, splashing up his once-pristine, embroidered whites. He reached for a cloth, his free hand rising to his mouth to hide his embarrassment. His tongue darted out, the custard tasted like rancid eggs.

“Voila!” He said, brightly. Applause erupted in a rattle of bracelets and watches. The WI would eat him alive.

100WC Week 5 - Light & Moist

It was a hot, sweltering afternoon with a jam-packed restaurant waiting impatiently. The Chef of the world famous 'Roules' restaurant was under immense pressure. The meat and the vegetables all had to be simmered to perfection. The main problem was the dessert. Sponge pudding and custard, simple yet effective.

"Make sure the sponge is light and moist!" screamed the chef trying to make himself heard above the clattering of plates and dishes. Quickly he whisked, stirred and prepared the custard. As the first dish was served, silence descended on the restaurant. You could hear a pin drop. The spoon enters the customers mouth and the custard tasted like...

100WC Week 5 - The Elegant Waiter

Looking at the menu, I went straight to the desert page. Then I could answer the question that always stumped me … starter or desert?
We were dining at Roast, above Borough market. It was a rustic, innovative restaurant with modern, British food.
“Madam, could I take your order please?” A tall, elegant waiter interrupted my thoughts. Desert! I ordered slow-roasted free-range pork belly with mashed potatoes and applesauce … and the desert!
After devouring my pork my reward was placed in front of me. Sticky toffee pudding. I loaded up my spoon and took my first bite. The custard tasted like liquid gold.

100WC Week 5 - Super Sunday

"Anyone for dessert?" shouted mum, who was trying to compete with the usual Sunday Sky Sports commentary. Having a break after your main cause is a necessity on roast day, especially after the mammoth feast we had just consumed.
"Yes please!" echoed the responses of us all from the lounge.
"Come and get it, or shall I eat it for you as well!" Like athletes out of their blocks, we leapt to kitchen. The steamy hot sponge with dripping treacle sauce, stared at us all invitingly. After smothering the sweet sensation in an adequate amount of custard, I prepared myself for my first bite. As the sponge touched my lips, the custard tasted like heaven. It tasted like nothing I had ever tasted before.

100WC Week 5 - Magical Custard

The children ambled on, scared, exhausted and starving. They were following an amazing smell. Suddenly they came across the enormous bowl, a giant sized bowl.

The custard tasted like strawberries and marshmallows all rolled in to one. It was a soft, sticky liquid with a light, airy constancy. It tasted of whatever they desired, it seemed too good to be true after the starvation of the last 24 hours, while they had been lost and wandering. Terry ate the custard using the long, unusual spoon.

“Is it a trap, who lives here, can custard really taste of all our favourite things?”

100WC Week 5 - The Dinner Party

I was starting to regret holding a dinner party. I was already on my second attempt of the main course. Who would want to eat dry, tough pork? I took out my expensive serving plate, it was a gold, bone china platter with an oriental garden design, which only came out on special occasions and as I wanted to make an impression, this was one of them. Time for dessert. Strawberry trifle. This was the first time I had attempted custard, but how difficult could it be? I tasted it....
"Oh no, I don't believe this is happening!"
The custard tasted like scrambled eggs!!!

100WC Week 5 - Lumpy Gloop

Every Sunday my Nan would make her sweet hot custard with a smooth silky texture, the custard tasted like heaven on a spoon. I decided I would try my hand at making it.
"How hard could it be" I said to myself.

I went for it and actually surprised myself, it looked good! However my sense of achievement soon turned to disappointment; within a few moments my custard had become a thick, lumpy gloop with an unsightly, elastic skin,

"I'm not eating that" exclaimed my daughter, and I couldn't blame her, the only place my 'custard' was going was in the bin!

100WC Week 5 - I'm Not Eating That!

Gingerly mum placed the piping hot, steaming, bowl onto the table. As she nervously edged herself away she winced, just as she had anticipated, the ear piercing screams began!

“I don’t want it, I don’t like it and I’m not eating that!” declared Precious with as much venom as she could muster. Her chubby, clenched fists with strength and determination descended into the custard. Shocked and astounded mum with clamped, gritted teeth reeled. Before she could speak, Precious had stuck out her tongue as the oozing liquid dripped off her nose. 

To her surprise, the custard tasted like nothing she had ever tasted before.

100WC Week 5 - The Best Ever

Frantically I ran down the cold, dark corridor as I heard a scream from the canteen! Forcefully, I pushed open the doors. Standing in the kitchen, her hands in the air, the cook screeched,

“It’s perfect, my chocolate cake is perfect! It’s got gooey custard inside.” Pausing, she smiled at me and said, “Go on taste it!”

Slowly I took a bite… thick creamy, custard oozing over moist, chocolate sponge. Like liquid gold sliding down my throat, I savoured the moment. The custard tasted like…a little piece of heaven.

“So how was it?” The cook asked pleadingly.

“The best I’ve ever tasted.” I replied.

100WC Week 4 - The Remote

Frustrated, irritated, maddened, I put the remote down and went into the kitchen. Who had taken the batteries? Someone in my house was always ‘borrowing’ the remote’s batteries for other devices (I had a sneaking suspicion that it was probably my brother, who is a total geek and has millions of gadgets).
After rummaging through the kitchen drawer, where all the items that didn’t have a home lived, I finally found what I was looking for. Returning to the living room, I picked up the remote. But when I put the batteries in, it sucked me into the television screen…

100WC Week 4 - Sam's Birthday

It was Sams birthday (7th birthday) a big deal for myself and my wife. We knew exactly what he wanted, he went on and on about this new flashy car. He would tell me endlessly how it lit up in the dark, could whiz round corners or turn round by itself. I think I was more excited to give him the car than he was, the moment came.

The birthday cake had been eaten and we gathered round Sam with his presents. He grabbed ours and ripped through the paper, a wide grin appeared across his face but when I went to put the batteries in I realised I had got the wrong ones.

100WC Week 4 - The Light of the Moon

Frightened, terrified, exhausted I ran from the house. Fear and adrenaline pulsated through me. For weeks I had been too scared to enter but curiosity lured me in.
With trepidation I climbed the creaky staircase (where the man was rumoured to have died). The light of the moon shone through the open window illuminating strange portraits that seemed to watch my every move. Entering the pitch black room I tried to use the torch I had with me ...but when I put the batteries in it...it didn’t work! Suddenly a dark figure flew at me...I ran as fast as I could to escape, never to return.

100WC Week 4 - Special Delivery

Excited by the surprise delivery I had received, I stared at the parcel that lay before my eyes. Pounding with expectation, my heart raced like a ticking clock. Could this really be what I thought it was? Confused, worried, bemused, I was a bag of mixed emotions, yet one stood stronger than the rest...curiosity.

Unable to wait a second longer (no change for me), I tore the appealing wrapping paper like a child at Christmas. There it was. There it was in front of my eyes. In front of my eyes and calling me to pick it up. Pick it up and give it a go; the game boy I had so desperately wanted. But when I put the batteries in, nothing could have prepared for me what happened...

100WC Week 4 - The Tantrum

Banging the toy train against the wall, the boy was rigid with rage. Annoyed, irritated, frustrated, I watched as he threw his broken train across the room. Without a set of batteries, his train (a Special Edition Thomas the Tank Engine) would not work…but when I put the batteries in it… the engine began to roar: lights flashed; music played; wheels spun.

The transformation from a miserable Ogre to Prince Charming was instant. Unfortunately the tantrum was not so easily forgotten. Removing the batteries I reminded him that his behaviour was unacceptable. Wet tears rolled down his rosy cheeks as he cried and gave his excuses for the outburst.

100WC Week 4 - The Puppy Dog

With Christmas approaching fast, anticipation and excitement brewing. An extremely happy girl awakes with an overflowing emotion, as she rushes down the twirling stairs like a herd of elephants. She then begins to unwrap her gifts, racing through them (as you do). When a gift was un wrapped that she hoped to receive, which was a small black and white puppy dog that walks and barks, saddened by the lack of entertainment, she moved it to one side, I then explained that batteries were needed. So when I put the batteries in it the little girl smiled and her eyes and mouth lighted up as if a lamp shone within.

100WC Week 3 - Gulp!

Despite its grandiose beauty, the immense, impressive and important wave came fast with great anger. Smashing, hitting whatever was in its way, it finally crashed on the tall and steady lighthouse and swallowed it in one big GULP!

Wow! Wow! Wow! They all shouted. Astonishment and worry struck against the spectators face as they were watching the scene from a distance. As they started to pray and hoped for people to come out, they could feel the spray thrown into the air on their face. Suddenly like as an answer to their
prayers, they could not believe what they saw...

100WC Week 5 - Sticky Toffee Pudding

“I’ll have sticky toffee pudding please” I pronounced to the waitress.

“Do ya want custard?” replied the sulky waitress.

“Definitely” was the only response required.

When the kitchen door opened, the hot, steaming pudding looked like a little piece of heaven on the plate. As the waitress carried it across the restaurant in slow motion, mouth salivating I couldn’t take my eyes of it. 

Light, fluffy sponge with smooth, rich and creamy custard, the dessert looked deliciously devilish. I plunged my spoon deep into the pudding, the sponge tasted delicate and moist and the custard tasted like nothing else I had ever savoured before.