Like the wind through the sea air, the roller coaster flew. Rag dolls tossed left to right, then left again. Screams mixing with laughter whizzed through my ears like wild banshees playing on the fears that attract so many. The rattling wooden frame thundered along under the wheels of the sturdy steel cart laden with thrill seekers.
After a moments rest, the ride takes a steep vertical turn... creeping upwards views to be savoured at the peak, hesitant arms raised ready for the descend. Down we go hurtling to the queuing hoard. We’ve made it, safe! The bottom at last,
and then the noise stopped.
WWW
ReplyDeleteThere are some good vocabulary choices to describe the speed of the ride: hurtling, whizzed, rattling.
EBI
The tense of the piece keeps changing. Some is in the past tense, some is in the present. The tense needs to be consistent.